Mar 22, 2011

I get a little bit stronger.

Almost four years ago I made the biggest decision of my life. I made the decision to leave a cheating husband and raise a child on my own. I got a little bit stronger.

I chose my own life and the life of an unborn child. I was strong. I was strong because of my own will, my own stubbornness, and my support group. I endured 9 months of pregnancy not knowing if this child's father would be in the picture. I got a little bit stronger.

On May 1, 2008, Olivia Rose was born into the world. I got a little bit stronger.

I indeed was going to raise my daughter alone. The decision I made in September 2007 was the decision I was going to have to keep, no matter the circumstances. Thank GOD I chose the decision for the unborn life. My family and my friends kept Olivia and I afloat (and still do!). I couldn't hold all the shed tears in a gallon jug if I tried. I got a little bit stronger.

I was forced to enter into a long and hard divorce, including a foreclosure and child support from a man I really wanted nothing to do with. I got a little bit stronger.

In November 2008, I was forced to say goodbye to my grandfather. Cancer took him away from me, but no one can ever take my memories. I miss him everyday and my one wish was that Olivia could have known him longer. I got a little bit stronger.

In July 2010, I made another huge decision for Olivia and me. I packed us up and moved to Texas. Sometimes it still feels like a vacation and soon I'll 'go home'. Yet, God led me this direction and He shall be the one who unfolds the reasons. A small corner has already been unfolded; my sister and I have the strongest relationship I could ever ask for. My only hope is our daughters will some day have that same bond. I got a little bit stronger.

A little over a year ago, I let someone in. Someone who made me happy, someone who made my daughter laugh, someone who accepted me and my 'baggage'. He helped me get a little bit stronger. As I sit here with tears streaming down my face, I am dealing with the fact that about a month ago, I had to let him move on. Once again, I got a little bit stronger.

My daughter is now almost three, and I have gotten a LOT stronger. She is happy and healthy. She is my backbone. She is my sunshine. She is my world.

People come and people go. As I get older and more mature, I can look back and just about pinpoint why everyone is/was placed into my life. I could sit here and name friends/family and say something about each one; but I won't, because I try everyday to let those people know face to face or ear to ear. I get a little bit stronger.

Watch out world.... I'm getting just a little bit stronger everyday..... for myself and her.

Sara Evans - A Little Bit Stronger


Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain
But I brushed my teeth anyway
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face
I got a little bit stronger

Riding in the car to work and I'm trying to ignore the hurt
So I turned on the radio, stupid song made me think of you
I listened to it for minute but I changed it
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger

And I'm done hoping that we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

Doesn't happen overnight but you turn around
And a month's gone by and you realize you haven't cried
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer
I'm busy getting stronger.

And I'm done hoping that we can work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking, that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

Getting along without you, baby
I'm better off without you, baby
How does it feel without me, baby?
I'm getting stronger without you, baby

And I'm done hoping we could work it out
I'm done with how it feels, spinning my wheels
Letting you drag my heart around
And, oh, I'm done thinking that you could ever change

I know my heart will never be the same
But I'm telling myself I'll be okay
Even on my weakest days
I get a little bit stronger

I get a little bit stronger
Just a little bit stronger
A little bit, a little bit, a little bit stronger
I get a little bit stronger

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails