I will serve the Lord.
So, this post is to relieve the many burdens on my shoulders at this time. I am not looking for sympathy, but sure wouldn't mind some prayers.
I need out of my house. I need someone else to take over. I am done emotionally and financially. As known before, I cannot divorce DAH until the house is sold or until I release him of financial obligation. I have had two prospective renters, which neither turned out.
My only other option is to relist the house, for a lower price, and pray that the right buyer comes along. Unfortunately, I need it sooner than later.
You see, I am completely stubborn and independent. I have worked my tail off to be this way and no don't want to falter on what I have accomplished to be this way. I have put tax returns, rebate checks, I have sold stuff on Craigslist, I am coaching three sports at work, all to go to Olivia's daycare funds and an emergency fund. I am not receiving child support for daycare so it is all on me.
Well... all was well if the house would have sold within the past 16 months it had been on the market. Well, the time as now come to where the daycare funds are not enough for next month. Yes, the emergency fund is there and this WILL be an emergency, but I REALLY need the house to sell.
It has been so hard emotionally to be so up and down, excited and disappointed. My mind is spinning, my stomach is in knots, and yet I am doing it. I am conquering my life. I am responsible for my finances and my daughter's. I will get through this.
I will put my trust in God. I will give more this month than ever. I will believe. I will hand it over. I will look for the good. I will sell things. I will pocket whatever I can. I will get through this.
I have always said... "Everything will be fine until October. In October we will worry." Well folks, put your hands together and instead of worrying for me.... please pray. Pray for guidance, for strength, for courage, for calmness, for the right path.
2 comments:
We are praying...
These struggles are in my prayers! I really appreciated your comment on my blog. It actually brought tears to my eyes. I am very sorry for your loss, but I'm so thankful your last months with your grandpa were happy! I can tell that you are a dedicated and wonderful mother, and I've heard the same. :) I'm glad you *found* me! Your daughter is gorgeous!
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